THE NIGHT BEFORE.

Within a twinkle of an eye,tables turned and our school customs and rules took a tremendous turn.The bell rang and the change of lifestyle and events were disposed to us at the assembly ground.Nobody was to object the new world order  we were been transitioned to.                                                                                                                                                              “We are doing this so as to prepare you in advance for the real world outside.The world of democracy,the voting world where you have power to elect the leader of your choice and cast a vote of no confidence to the one who would lazy around”These were the words echoed by our school head as  she introduced The Student Council Board which replaced  the so-called Prefect Board.Just to highlight the difference;The Student Council Board is a board formed by elected students who would lead in various departments in school whereas the Prefect Board was more like a dictatorial system of governments where teachers would select the pets or rather puppets to run the school.

These were Good news indeed!Minds did some somersaults as they pondered on how to empower each other to vote for none teachers pets/puppets to run for the mentioned  positions.As long as one had good grades and was a celeb in school that was a sure ticket to The Student Council Board.

Statistics aside,I’d like to capture how the campaigns were run.One would get a few supporters buy them chapatis from the school canteen and urged them to ‘sakanyaa’ votes for them.Actually, I happened to be among those who ate the chapatis and were asked to run the campaigns.During the eleventh hour preps were cancelled and classrooms turned into campaign dens where dance and praise songs hailed the day.

But one would get shocked come voting and when results were announced.Those who had the list number of supporters were the ones to took the lead.One would wonder what happened,right?Simple,the campaigners ate the chapatis and cared less for what the runners would get.We actually ate the chapatis and told the people not to be manipulated by anyone just the night before elections.Yeah,yeah,I know you’re wondering how mean the campaigners were.Sure,why should a chapati a day cause us a lifetime of torture ahead?

Well, I think we as Kenyans could take this lesson home.Am sorry if you’re a politician and this has been your tactic throughout.This might just be an eye opener-we,don’t need your money Mwanasiasa to coerce us into giving you our votes.We are tired of your empty words we want to see actions,we are tired of been your stepping stones to fuller bellies we are about to begin a revolt.Watch this  pace,its not a threat we just want you to upgrade your game lest you also experience the stomach aches of The Night before!

 

 

 

LOADED EULOGIES!

“Luwere luwere luwere luwereee luwere luwere luwere Kwa Baba luwere”

Tears would readily flow, hearts would dearly sob upon one’s event of demise.

All and sundry would weep and curse the wave of death that has swept their beloved away.

Sure, death is such a foe none wants to come into contact with.

Funeral arrangements must be done to give the dead a decent send away.

‘Paying the last respect many would say.’

But personally I hate attending most of these send away for here you’ll probably

meet pure hypocrisy. Am not saying that one should not shade tears for their gone beloved,

what I mean is that most just come to stage a show.

A time in history I attended a promotion to glory ceremony and I almost offended my host

for lack of social manners. Wait! Don’t crucify me yet I’ll justify my ruthless  mannerisms. See ,

There was this woman who stormed the funeral grounds wailing like some busy ambulance

in service. She came in and did all gymnastics as she expressed the loss of losing her beloved.

“Mayomayo mayoooo! Mayoooo…….”She went on tearing down like some fallen pillar.

Well the host had to calm her down. As usual, a cup of tea escorted with some light snacks

is a way of appreciating those wasted tears of the be. Imagine after galloping down the mouthy delicacy

this woman asked,”Ni nani amekufa?”

Now I raise my hands in utter surrender, do you see my cause of laughter amidst a cloud

of mourning?

Again, I rarely attend these promotion to glory ceremonies due to the loaded eulogies that

grace these events. Am not inhumane , I simply can’t stand overstatements!

“He was a man of integrity,” The preacher would proclaim even though that man the most

wanted criminal in the society.Infact ,many were waiting for the day he’d leave them in peace.

I wouldn’t be shocked if that was the very same man who stole my grandpa’s chicken

the night before he was stoned to death. Well during his funeral service he would be

presented to us as ‘a man of ‘nyadhi’ and he died while fighting for a ‘good course’.

Now a martyr  they say he was!Yet he had been pegged down for robbery!

What pisses me of the most is the flock of mourners who sob and blow their noses

at the mention of every respectful statement.Then you wonder,whether you land from moon since

you are the only one whose eyes are as dry as Kalahari desert.

“He was one dedicated and devoted man…”Sure? Yet he hardly reckoned that

he had a family to cater for there needs as he spent endless hours in the chan’gaa den .

The highest fit of sarcasm hits as his family responds by sobbing the more yet the previous

night he was caught red- handed having’ mpago wa kando.’ His death was as a result of thorough

beating from’ mzee wa nyumba.’

Come on Comrades, for once lets stop this heighten speed of madness of  reloading  eulogies.

Lets learn to pay respect where its due. Am yet to witness a promotion to glory  ceremony where

a spade remains a spade not a big spoon.

“Ting ‘a malo, tinga,ting’a maloo mmh!

Ting’a malo,ting’a adhi anee dalla”

 

NUGGETS OF WISDOM FROM KIDAGAA KIMEMWOZEA

Kidagaa Kimemwozea isn’t a new book in the hood especially for the Kenyan high-school scholars Undertaking the

8-4-4 system. I know many of these students curse at the pile of books they ought to read just for the sake of some

examination papers yet barely do knowledge from these books help them in life but sure whoever

introduced Kidagaa Kimemwozea by the renown writer Ken Walibora was not a fool at all! As much as I wish

the ministry of education could do something about the current education system I think they did well to choose this

riveting read for the youngsters .

 

Our nation is currently ailing from worse pandemics than Ebola .The maddening sickness in our nation is nothing to do

with Malaria nor Typhoid rather a moral decay that threatens to contaminate all and sundry. I would like to compare our

ailing nation with the setting ground of Kidagaa Kimemwozea which is Sokomoko. Here, we meet characters like Mtemi

Nasaba Bora and Bwana Majisifuu who serve as good examples of failing leaders. In Sokomoko we meet all types of people

and all manner of evil in an ailing society. As you read on you will realize that change is inevitable as well as its possible.

 

I would have carried on but I want you to get yourself a copy from the nearest book shop and download the lessons all by

yourself ‘sitaki kukupea mwakenya!’. But let me highlight one lesson for you dearest reader:

In this amazing book I met characters like Amani and Imani. These represent the beacons of change and hope in the

society. They are so simple yet so real. Even after months of reading this Kidagaa of a book  their roles in the society

feels reals. When you are through reading Kidagaa you unconsciously look around for such amazing characters around you who

are endowed with  virtues that make them a hallmark generation.Sad to say, yes do we have the Amanis and Imanis in our nation

who could turn Kenya into such a haven of integrity yet they have choose to keep mum for one reason or another. Another is a lot of tamed  Kenya who have chosen to take the negative action of injustice and e like they were born in hell just for their selfish gain.

Well,let me stop preaching and hit the nail on the head. As I let you search for nuggets of wisdom from Kidagaa allow me to share

with you a quote that says ‘live so that when people think of fairness,caring,love, integrity and all virtues thereof-they will think of you’

Just as I think cool of Amani and Imani I wonder which legacy I’d leave behind upon the event of my demise.

 

Well dearest reader, next time you read a book check out for hidden treasure within! I therefore salute Ken Walibora for this

awesome book.Dearest reader,you have not read books if you have not read Kidagaa Kimemwozea!

 

 

 

THE WISE LECTURE

Three students at a certain university decided to dodged an exam.The next time they meet their lecture

they decided to lie of their absence.They told the lecture that they had gone to a friend’s wedding which

took place the previous day before their papers.When they were coming back they met hefty traffic which

caused them to delay.Some distance away from the university grounds their vehicle stack in mad.The

lecture pardoned them and decided to give them another paper to attempt.He sat them in separate rooms

and gave them the question papers to fill.The instructions read:

ALL YOUR ANSWERS MUST BE THE SAME.

The questions were just as simple as:

1)What is the name of your friend whose wedding you attended?

2)Where was the venue?

3)Which was the theme color for your friend’s wedding?

Am sure none of these guys passed with flying colors! These students must have felt so stupid.

But how many times do we cheat to get our way out?Honesty is a virtue, we can all cultivate .

For once lets just go against the grain and be a different lot.I repeat, honesty is a virtue we can all

cultivate.

 

RESOLUTION ONE MASHUJAA DAY

South Africans are known to be one proud lot of their nationality despite the fact that they gained their

independence just the other day. Contrary, Kenyans are known to be haters of their on land.This is

such an irony when almost the whole world knows that Kenya is a gold mine of a nation! It is among the

first nations to gain independence and one that has got strong characters for leaders.I know we have been ranked top in the list of corruption.I know we have sited in many scandals.But dear ones,could

we just for a moment take off those wooden glasses and see what a country we have!I mean, check

out the sandy beaches-why do you think that ‘Mzunguu’ paid to visit us? Marvell at the freedom of

Worship-who has  ever had a gun pointed at their forehead because of religion?Come on Comrades,

lets drop down the complainant attitude and just act peacock for once! I know the economy is

pricking your toes but hey!We can choose to be a proud lot too.As we celebrate this day lets

strive to make Kenya a better place. If it is to be it is up to WE! Wish you a fad ‘Mashujaa’ Day!